I have struggled with my weight for years. In college I ballooned up, but was lucky to overcome it before my wedding and keep most of it off (we can thank dental surgery and wedding stress for that). Since then I have fluctuated between the same ten pounds, and it is a round and round cycle.
The problem is, I suck at diets, and exercise and I are not the best of friends.
For me strict diets don’t work for the long haul. Counting calories works for some, but for me I get burnt out and then go on an eating rampage and fall of the wagon. Exercise I can do, it is just committing to make the time. Thankfully my husband and I are now exercising together. This is keeping us motivated and accountable for getting moving at least every other day.
But let’s get back to the food part of dieting shall we.
I love food. I love to eat. I know I am an emotional eater, and that is a daily battle, and so is boredom eating. Being aware is helpful, but learning to say no to that treat in the break room or that extra cookie is still something I am just learning to do.
I have committed to not weight myself for a month at least because the scale does evil things to my emotions and motivation. When it is up, whether from eating too much or exercise water weight I lose motivation to keep going. When it gets low I think “oooh skinny girl now I can eat junk and drink wine.” Then I put the weight back on and then we are back to the higher weight issue … see the slippery slope?
The biggest thing is that I have committed to take the word diet out of my mouth. Because it isn’t working for me, in fact it is doing more harm than good. It is now time to embrace sensible portions, treats and wine sparingly, and choosing the right foods. It is making the time to work out several times a week, but not feel like I need to make sure I know how many calories I am burning.
It is time to do the not diet diet. I know that makes absolutely no sense to call it that, but that is exactly what it is.
And you know what? I am about a week into making a lifestyle change and I feel better. I am making the right choices not because I have to or to stay in my calorie range, but because I want to. It could be in my brain, but I feel slimmer, and my confidence is back up.
And my confidence needs to be up if I plan to trot around in a swimsuit in a couple weeks in Maui.
It’s a constant battle isn’t it? Maybe I will find the right formula one day. And I hope that day is today.
